Why knowing your attachment style is important in relationships

Instead of asking for someone’s zodiac sign to measure compatibility, you should ask for their attachment style instead. According to psychologist John Bowlby, our early attachments (with our parents, for example) influence the way we act in our adult relationships. In this School of Life video, the three basic attachment styles are explained.

Secure types are comfortable with getting close to others and find it easy to be in a stable relationship.

Anxious types want to get close to their partner but constantly worry that their partner doesn’t feel the same.

Avoidant types are hesitant to get too close to others and are not really comfortable with intimacy.

Knowing your and your partner’s attachment style will inform the decisions you make in relationships. Not just with romantic partners, but also with friends. It will help you better understand your feelings and behavior, and being aware of these will help you change any toxic mindset you have with regard to relationships.


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