Why does Coleen feel guilty as a mother at times?
Parenthood is a two-way street—parents can learn a thing or two just as much as kids learn a bunch from them. This fact cannot be more honest in Coleen Garcia’s case who shares her life-long learnings in raising her firstborn with Billy Crawford, Amari.
The celebrity actress sat as one of the panelists for an in-depth discussion of children’s intelligence and emotional quotients presented by Enfagrow A+ Four NuraPro called “Getting Kids School-Ready, Future Ready! on September 9 at Robinson’s Magnolia Activity Center.
During the forum, Coleen shares that raising Amari is an experience both “exciting and overwhelming.”
She then elaborates that “mom guilt” has been a challenge she constantly faces now more than ever that Amari has just turned three on September 10.
Coleen reveals, “Sabi ko nga kay Billy, baka naman sana sa next, ako na lang yung daddy, ikaw naman yung mommy.
Iza Calzado, who sat as a moderator for the forum seconds, ”Definitely, there is mom guilt, and I, like I said, I have experienced that. Feeling ko nga, parang, hindi pa ako nanganganak nun, alam mo na, e. Meron na, e.
Iza Calzado’s child is named Deia Amihan—also a firstborn with husband Ben Wintle.
With the acknowledgment from both mothers that parenting is an act of ”surrender,” Coleen then shares a positive learning experience about mom guilt.
She begins, “In a sense, I feel like it’s really rooted in your own insecurities. So, if you’re a person with insecurities, which we all are, then you will definitely be vulnerable to mom guilt talaga.
“It’s just inevitable, really. It will happen talaga. But you know, in the same way, you treat your insecurities, that’s the same way you approach your mom guilt.
“‘Di ba, it helps to affirm yourself, to just continue to encourage yourself out and to have a good support system that will remind you na ‘You’re doing great.’”
Despite feeling such from time to time, Coleen then left a self-affirming note that she’s trying her best to raise Amari to the best of what he can be.
This, too, comes with a realization that “There are so many positive experiences and things about being a mother that really outweigh all of that,” she says.
Coleen then urges to talk about this particular struggle more frequently to make mothers out there feel “that they are not alone.”
She continues, “Sometimes, that will cause depression if you don’t talk about these things. But of course, talking about these things doesn’t erase the fact that there’s so many positive things.
“So many wins, so many silver linings, and just a lot of beautiful moments about being a parent.”
Coleen Garcia and Billy Crawford’s approach in raising Amari
Three years a mother now and Coleen seems to know an effective way of raising a well-rounded child.
True that experience is the greatest teacher of all, Coleen then says she and Billy try to put Amari out in the world.
She reveals, “We spend a lot of time with him and expose him to various experiences because we want Amari to adapt to different environments and interact with people.
“When we were in Paris, we rode buses and trains, and when we were at home, we exposed him to everyday chores like laundry day, cooking time, etc.”
While this might come a bit overwhelming for a child, Coleen assures that they are taking Amari’s learning “slowly” and with a lot of “intuitive tools.” Through this, they are able to observe Amari’s interests.
Banner Art Dani Sison